Love definitely feels good, and that's why most of us crave a relationship. Emotional responses are expected in relationships, such as being happy or excited for a new partner, getting angry or stressed out after an argument. This is not love addiction. Love addiction, also called "pathological love," is a pattern of obsession that can negatively affect a person's relationships, often due to the intensity, confidence, a sense of loss of control surrounding emotions, and more.
Symptoms of Love Addiction
Addiction to love does not necessarily mean addiction to sex or intimacy. In fact, love addiction can come with relationships of high intensity but little real intimacy.Here are some possible signs of an unhealthy addiction in love:
·Obsession with your object of attraction or romantic interest. Sometimes people face this obsession when love is unrequited.
.Relying on love, romance or a romantic partner as the primary source of happiness and emotional regulation.
· Relationships that tend towards intensity or are unhealthy interdependent rather than promoting interdependence.
.The need to jump into relationships quickly, jump from relationship to relationship, or always be in a relationship.
.Experiencing withdrawal-like symptoms when you don't get the love and romance you desire.
It may seem that romantic relationships completely control or greatly affect your emotional state. Love addiction can hurt relationships, sometimes even before it starts. Someone with a love addiction may become obsessed with a person and think about them all the time. When they are away from that person and dependent on being with them, they may feel depressed and hopeless. When the relationship ends for any reason, they feel deprived and empty until they find a new object for their love, which is usually very fast. There are several possible reasons for the emergence of love addiction. The good news is that love addiction is something you can manage and heal. Even if it's something you've had for a while, it's possible to have healthy relationships after a love addiction.
5 Reasons Behind Love Addiction
Abandonment Chart
An underlying cause of love addiction is often abandonment issues. Often, these problems originate in childhood due to the absence of parents or primary caregivers. Being abandoned by one's spouse or long-term friend can also lead to love addiction. Abandonment plays a role in love addiction. The person is so afraid of being alone that they may attach themselves to anyone who wants to have them. They may not know how to be alone or who they are without a relationship in their life. He jumps from relationship to relationship, wanting nothing more than to be loved to feel like he belongs. Abandonment does not necessarily mean that the person has been physically abandoned. With emotional abandonment, people realize that they somehow believe they are not worthy of being loved. When this happens, love addiction ensues as you yearn to be accepted by someone. This can lead to very unhealthy behaviors because the person will do whatever it takes to keep the love in their life. He will feel that he must do whatever is asked of him to be worthy of the love he longs for. Abandonment problems can get worse throughout adulthood. If parents emotionally abandon someone, that person may be attracted to others with the same emotional unavailability. This leads to relationships that don't last, further deepening the belief that they are worthless. This makes love addiction a vicious cycle that can worsen over time without the right mental health support.
Filling the Blank
One possible cause of love addiction is that the person is trying to fill a void within themselves. Loving someone and being loved in return gives that meaning when life feels empty and meaningless. He may think that the only way to be important to the world is to fall in love. This may be due to the way love affects the brain. Since love provides a reward, it makes sense for someone to rely on it for positive emotions and purposes. This is one reason why love addiction is so harmful to relationships; Being emotionally dependent on the other person can strain the partnership. Depression can make you feel empty, and two of the primary symptoms are a low mood or loss of interest in activities. This can manifest with other symptoms such as emotional lethargy or excessive crying, sleeping too much or too little, feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness or guilt, and more. Some people who are addicted to love fall into severe depression when their relationship ends and can only come out of this depression when a new relationship is established.
Links Between Childhood and Addiction
Many people who are addicted to love may have had difficult experiences in their childhood. They were physically cared for but emotionally deprived in their relationships with their families or caregivers. Others may have been abandoned at a young age by someone close to them or experienced some other form of trauma or abuse. While not everyone with a love addiction has these difficulties in the past, most people have problems from childhood. This is true for most addictions, including substance or gambling addiction. Addiction provides them with an emotion they feel they've been missing for most of their lives.
Childhood Trauma
Many people with a love addiction may have experienced childhood trauma. It can be a single event or a lifelong condition. Emotional, verbal, sexual,and physical abuse can all play a role in love addiction. As a result of the abuse, the person may feel unloved or worthless, and an intense love affair gives them consolation. Alternatively, such intense love can provide relief that the person has never experienced before. If you have not experienced healthy love, your emotional needs have not been met, or you are otherwise faced with a lack of care, the intensity can feel very comforting.
Love addiction can take a toll on your mental and physical health. Not only can it cause problems with your social life and ability to be happy, it can also lead to risky behaviors that put your health at risk. However, you can learn to build positive relationships and be alone when necessary. Whatever the reason, love addiction is not your fault. If love addiction is something you're experiencing or think you're into, talking to a therapist can help. Not only can the therapist help you address potential underlying concerns when needed, they can also help you build self-esteem, be satisfied whether you're in a relationship or not, and build or build healthy relationships going forward. You can find a therapist online by signing up on a reputable platform where expert psychologists like Tappy work. Read Tappy counselors' blog posts or contact us for more information on online counseling.